Psalm 103

1 Praise the LORD , O my soul; all my inmost being, praise his holy name.
2 Praise the LORD , O my soul, and forget not all his benefits-
3 who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases,
4 who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion,
5 who satisfies your desires with good things so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.
6 The LORD works righteousness and justice for all the oppressed.
7 He made known his ways to Moses, his deeds to the people of Israel:
8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love.
9 He will not always accuse, nor will he harbor his anger forever;
10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities.
11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him;
12 as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.
13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;
14 for he knows how we are formed, he remembers that we are dust.
15 As for man, his days are like grass, he flourishes like a flower of the field;
16 the wind blows over it and it is gone, and its place remembers it no more.
17 But from everlasting to everlasting the LORD's love is with those who fear him, and his righteousness with their children's children-
18 with those who keep his covenant and remember to obey his precepts.
19 The LORD has established his throne in heaven, and his kingdom rules over all.
20 Praise the LORD , you his angels, you mighty ones who do his bidding, who obey his word.
21 Praise the LORD , all his heavenly hosts, you his servants who do his will.
22 Praise the LORD , all his works everywhere in his dominion.
Praise the LORD , O my soul.

Weekend break

Stayed in this weekend. I've been out of town the last 2 weeks consecutively, so thought i'll make it up and be a good girl and catch up on my work this weekend. Well, went down to town to help one of my Architecture friends do a survey on ple in the city. We had to approach strangers and ask them questions like "Do you feel stressed in the city?" sort of questions. I approached an old women and she looked so terrified of me initially, heh. But she was really nice, a typical british retiree, like to drink tea outdoors and look at the world pass by sort of thing... Got 'daoed' by a few people as expected, felt like back in Singapore again, doing Flag day. heh. Had my first Jap mean here in UK! Ate Udon noodles, can't really say how good it is cos i don't eat Jap food frequently, even back in Sgp. Well, was nice for a change, hall food getting really dreary =/ Bleh

Church in the morning tmr, prob drop by a friend's place to visit and talk. Then do some studying back in my room. Days getting mundane sometimes, have frequent lapses in concentration when i study as well, but guess it's alright for now cos exams arent here yet. Daily struggle, but really thankful for the occasional phone calls (=)), chatting to friends back home and all. God's been gracious and faithful despite my faithlessness... it's amazing how He has brought me this far, through my A levels, scholarship process, and all. It's been a long way, and a long way to go, but i will have to trust and depend on Him for everything.

Another weekend's here and will pass soon. Take care and God bless you all :)

a thought

Is it possible to feel happy yet depressed at the same time? i think it is... =/

Miscellaneous stuff...

Whee. Finally had my fav choc - cookies and cream here in England! Tasted great. Heh. :)

Was talking to a catholic yesterday, asking about the difference between catholism and protestants - penance, pergertry (i don't think that's how you spell it...), traditions, etc... Kinda changed my views on catholic. Want to find out more, what other ple believe in, want to be more open-minded, find out why ple believe the things they believe in... But in the end I must decide for myself what I believe. So I might go for mass one day, it's a catholic service, just to experience what's it like...

Had hall formal dinner last night. It's almost like prom nite, just that there's no fancy ballroom or hotel. Knew everyone was gonna be really dressed up, as in, REALLY dressed up, so I wore the only dress I brought here... And borrowed a pair of high heels from a friend. I havent worn a heel since prom last year, so I was trying really hard to balance and walk elegantly... heh. Pam with a dress, heels, some make-up, and with her hair let down. Pam transforms for the night. Food was BAD... dried up chicken for the main course. Only good thing was the dessert (usually is), caramel cake i think.

Didn't have lessons today, slept in late, missed breakfast. Played some songs on my guit, it's been a long time since I've done that. Didnt bring my songbook so playing the same songs pretty much over and over again. Bleh. But keeps my fingers from going soft so i'll still be able to play when I get back home! Played tennis today as well. Just me and 3 other guys... practised some serves, getting better at it. At least it gets in more often! I have to play a little differently cos of the strong winds here, have to adjust my strokes according to the direction of the wind. Played doubles with the guys, quite fun, but definitely not as enjoyable as tennis back home :) Miss those sunday sessions.

Went for Bible study in the evening, watched a short video on Jesus and the Sea of Galilee, about the fishermen, Peter walking on water, etc. Quite interesting but I was kinda tired, so dozed off a couple of times. Heh. But managed to learn some stuff. When storms come, when we wonder where God is in our situation, He's in the boat all along with us. Sometimes He allows us to struggle for a while, or sometimes very long... so that we build character and perserverance, and also, we realise how weak we are... And it's at that point when we've got no energy, strength and whatsoever left, that we cry out to Him to save us - just like the disciples - that He calms the storm... Ultimately, He's in control of the situation, and no trouble, no difficulty, no problem is too big for Him.

Essay is due in a week. Argh. I hate DEADlines. Make me so nervous and kan-chiong. This counts for 25% of my first year grade. Bleh. I'm about half way thru my first draft. Have to speed up if I wanna produce a good essay in time.

Hope you guys are having a good week so far. Take care and God bless ya all. :)

German frenzy!

Guten Tag!
Heute ich stehe um viertel vor neun Uhr auf und fruhstucke um neun Uhr. Ich lerne abends zu Hause und hore Musik nachmittags. Um funf Uhr habe ich eine Deutschstunde. Das Abendessen ist um sechs Uhr. Am arbend bleibe ich zu Hause und lerne und schreibe E-Mails. Ich gehe um eins Uhr dreizig ins Bett.
Guten Nacht!

Translation: Good morning! Today i got up at 845am and had breakfast at 9am. I studied and listened to music in the afternoon. I had German class at 5pm. Dinner was at 6pm. I studied and emailed in my room at night. I went to bed at 1.30am. Goodnight!

Going german crazy now, i'm supposed to be able to talk about my day in german by this thursday! Was quite lost in class today.. Bleh. Amazing how simple sentences in English can sound so 'qhim' in german, and btw i took about 10mins just to type that! (and with the help of my notes....) Well, for those wanting to pick up a German boyfriend/girlfriend, you can pick up some phrases from here! ;)

Thoughts

To come back to that place
Where I could seek You
with all my heart and mind
To reach out to You
Once again
This is what I need.

To hang on to your promise
To trust
To press on
to live a life that pleases You
Your grace and mercy
Despite those raging thoughts
In my weaknesses and flaws

Alton Towers

Went to Alton towers with a friend from Brunei - Chrysteen (i shall start to put names so every time i talk abt someone i dont have to say 'a friend from ____') today. Most of my Singaporean friends went down to London this weekend so they couldn't come. Didnt want to go at first cos of that, but managed to find someone to accompany me! I heard many stories about Alton towers (mostly good) and I really wanted to check it out for myself, other than the fact I haven't been to an amusement park since 5 years back i think. Needed a break from school and studying as well...
We only had abt 8 hours there (which isnt much considering each ride takes about an hour to queue) so we rushed for the first ride in our sight. The second scariest ride there (i think). Tossed me up, down, left, right centre at incredible speeds, we were so dizzy after that we decided to go for the 'milder' rides to 'warm up' first. Heh.
Rapids, mine train, flume ride(!) Got drenched from bottom down on the last one. It's like the 'log ride' that used to be in Haw Par Villa except you are guaranteed to get wet (esp if youre sitting in front which i was!) Walking in wet shoes and pants in cold british weather isn't really pleasant, quite uncomfortable actually. But thank God the weather wasn't too cold, so was still bearable...
So we rushed from queue to queue, ride to ride, hoping we can make the most of our money and time here. Q for 60 mins for a 5 min (or less) ride. So effectively i think we were only on the rides for abt 50 mins at the most? But some of them were really worth the queueing in the rain (yes! it rained! Like Singapore rain...) There's this 'rollar coaster ride' that positions you in a 'superman position' such that you're facing the ground, and works like a normal rollarcoaster. Pure adrenaline rush. I wonder how come Escape theme park doesnt have rides like those. Maybe for those of you reading this, you could write in and suggest to them and they might just give you an annual pass to the theme park! Not that you want to. heh.
Fireworks and a Halloween show on ice to end the night. Fireworks display was quite spectacular, amazingly the rain stopped JUST before the fireworks started and the rain began again RIGHT after the display.
Yup. Such an exciting but tiring day... Now back to reality, got psy essay to do, german words to memorise, lectures to revise and understand, theology reading... Bleh. =/ I'll prob work myself harder this week since I slacked off so much this week and weekend. Or Prisons Service will soon terminate me from service!
Well, have a great weekend and week ahead yourself.

Rantings and Update for the week

The week has passed really fast, maybe it's because i've been more busy this week, with classes, tennis (ie. exercise and training for Nottingham games), planning for the floorball club, researching for my essay and other stuff. Time just seems to fly.. and lately i've been feeling really lazy and unproductive as well =/ Not revising my lectures or classes here, back in Singapore i used to make my own notes after every lecture! heh. I wonder where Mugger Pam disappeared to, i need her now! Going to Alton Towers tmr, it's this theme park in UK with lots of scary rides... So even less work done in the weekend, got lots of catching up to do next week. Bleh. And i might really be going gliding in Nov.. then i'll be in floorball. Sheesh. Now things really seem to be getting busy. Well, it's first year so hopefully still can cope with all these commitments, really want to make the most out of it. But not get too busy or immersed in all these activities that I forget about God and living my life for Him as well. Got lots to learn... Been staying up till 2 and 3 the past few nights to do reading (notes and textbooks) I dont really know how much to study cos they give you so much freedom here, so I dont know how much im supposed to read either. And ive got this nagging and guilty feeling that i've not done enough.

Well, hope you guys have had a good week. For all those studying for exams, study hard and all the best! Will be keeping you all in prayer.
God bless and have a great weekend.
-Pam

On British weather

It's been raining for the past 48 hours i think. On and off. British weather is really strange and unpredicatble - almost like women, heh. It can be sunny and clear when you get up in the morning and just when i'm about to go for class an hour later it's pouring cats and dogs. =/ And it hailed last night! Thankfully I was indoors by then so i could only hear the loud pattering on the windows. The wind has been amazingly strong as well, as I was walking back from class last night, my friend and I had to hold on to each other so we wontbe blown away! Well, not so bad, but strong enough such that we had to lean forward to walk, and I could feel myself being blown by the wind... The last time i experience that was in the mountains in New Zealand i think! So much for UK weather...

Song

Whee. It's 2am in the morning and i'm utterly bored. Taking a break from reading for my essay... I figure i work best when it's really quiet, fewer distractions that way... Still distractions nevertheless, but fewer. Not much inspiration today so shall take off the lyrics of a song...
For those who's looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, looking for a spring in the midst of the desert, the Lord's still carrying you through...

Third Day - 40 Days
From the album Come Together

Here I am at what feels like the end
And so I come to You, my Lord, again
With this burden buried deep within
This heart that You have made
In this trial that I'm going through
I don't question 'cause I know it's true
That the sorrow brings me back to You
And You have made me stronger

It's been forty days and forty nights
Down the road of many trials
And I pray it's only for a season
'Cause in the wilderness and in the flood
You're the one I'm thinking of
And I know You've brought me for a reason

I have one more thing I've got to say
Before they try to take my life away
Let it be known that I am not afraid
Let You will be done, Lord

Memories

Sometimes it's better not to have a good thing
than to have it for a while
only to be taken away...

Feel like going to the beach for a walk now. Miss those days when I could just walk over to the bedok jetty from my condo... The sea breeze, the people fishing along the jetty, the occasional cyclists, and the food at the lagoon... When I could just let my thoughts run without being afraid...

Leaves are falling,
Trees getting bare,
Rain falling outside my bedroom window.
Autumn's here
to stay.

Trip to York

We underestimated the time to walk to the bus departure point and ended up having a early 'morning run' to catch the bus. So much for punctuality. heh. Well needless to say we were the last to board the bus... We were all quite sleepy still so all of us caught up on our sleep on the bus to York. It took abt 2 hours to get there. It started raining heavily on the way there but the sun was out when we arrived! God answered our prayers for good weather :) (it's been raining almost everyday here now...)

Our first stop when we got there - the toilet! heh. of course. How could we not visit the toilet before we begin our exploration. I was torn between joining the Singaporean grp and my hall grp, but i cant have the best of both worlds, so decided to give up familiarity to try 'bond' with my hallmates better. And I'm trying not to stick too much with the Singaporean community here, as tempted as i might be.

We walked ard the ancient walls of York to get a general view of the city... Was quite a narrow wall and we had to walk single file, and it was a two-way traffic! So you can imagine how squeezy it was... didnt see much but trees and a glimpse of the York Cathedral though.

Highlight of the day was York Cathedral. It's the largest cathedral in the whole of UK i think.. took 250 years to build! That's about 3 generations! Either it was really tough to build or the workers were just lazy... you decide. heh. I was thinking how many small churches they could have built in place of that. Well, grand and massive it was. It was so big it felt as cold inside as it was outside. And on each side of the cathedral were infamous stained glass windows, each of which had 190 glass pieces (i was paying attention when the tour guide was speaking...) altogether, i think that works out to about thousands of glass pieces altogether! And each stained glass had it's own significance and story behind it. Like there were some paintings of the 12 apostles, famous prophets, Jesus, Mary, the star of David, the line of Jesus, etc.. Some of them even had pictures of monkeys for goodness knows what reason. The architecture was really intricate and detailed, the stone walls had sculptures of people and all. We spent about 2 hours in there, just walking around the entirely place, and we didnt even cover everything in detail. Quite enjoyed the experience, though i felt that it was more of a tourist attraction than a place of worship to God. There was a general feeling of reverance and respect, and not of cosyness or friendliness... (not that i expected it to feel that way, just a thought)

Wanted to visit the national railway museum but didnt have time so we just walked around the town area, tourist district with the shops and all... Popped in and out of sovenir shops to browse through stuff, and also to seek refuge from the cold. heh. It started drizzling later in the afternoon but wasnt too bad though (not for UK standards at least). I bought a postcard, a watch and some other sovenirs...

Bis ride back was quite an interesting one. Met a girl from Brunei, started a casual conversation with her which ended up into singing chinese christian songs like 'you yi wei shen', etc... heh. Reminds me of service back at home... though i'm not really a fan of Mandarin, i really love and miss those chinese christian songs i sang at church... Well, she shared with me about her church back in Brunei, and i shared a little about mine.

Didn't manage to get any work done today =/ But was a refreshing trip indeed. Might go back there again someday! Now, back to reality...

Hope you guys had a great weekend, take care and have a blessed week ahead :)

Solid Rock gathering

Went for cell group gathering at a friend's house tonight. There's a christian group here in Nottingham called "Solid Rock" comprising mostly of Singaporeans and Malaysians, we meet every friday night and have a time of praise & worship followed by bible study or a message by a guest speaker. Almost like YPM, only smaller (they're about 40 regulars every week) My cell group had a first social (that's what they call 'hanging out and relaxing' here) today. We had a pot luck style dinner - traditional fried rice with lots of chilly(!), herbal&soya cauce chicken, tau gay, stir-fried broccoli, char siew, sweet&sour pork, battered chicken,prok ribs, apple pie... etc etc. heh. Think it's been the best meal ive had here. Felt almost like home again :) I gained exactly 500 grams after dinner! We played pictionary after that... my group was trailing far behind the other 2 grps initially but we caught up and won in the end! Teaches us not to give up, and to strive on even though we might be losing, or trailing behind, that there's still hope till the journey comes to an end.. expect the impossible! :) It was really hilarious, enjoyed myself thoroughly, it's been a long time since i laughed so hard. heh. Feels good to laugh again :) There are 2 non-christians in my cell grp as well, a thai and a malaysian from my hall, they are rather open to the gospel, thank God for that... Pray that i'll be a good witness for Him to them, and that they'll come to know of our Father's love and forgiveness for them...

We're almost on our way to starting a floorball club here! Have a lot of admin stuff to do and hurdles to get by to register our club with the Atheletic Union here, as well as to get the equipment, book the facilities and get committed members and all... still in the midst of working things out. Really hope we'll be able to get it started... i can finally be part of some sport here, right now i'm kinda 'sportless'. And we'll get to compete in the national floorball leagues as well! My hockey senior from rj has been trying to start it since last year.. and has been unsuccessful since, hope it'll come through this year...

Going for a day trip to York tmr. First holiday here! Somewhat excited. I heard it's one of UK's oldest and nicest town... will take lots of pics and show you k?
Have a good weekend ahead my friends, God bless!

Happenings in Notts

Lately there has been quite shocking news reported in Notts. A few days ago a 14-year old girl was shot just as she was coming out of the goose fair. Some guys in a car drove by and opened fire at her... She was rushed to hospital but she didnt make it... She was a black girl i think, a student, a christian, talented, smart, well-liked and loved by her family and friends. Quite sad... But at least she's in heaven now... Didnt believe at first when i heard abt it, i was just at the goose fair the day before the incident i think... Kinda freaky.
Weather reports say that it's gonna snow late next week! And it's not even winter! Unbelievable. Probably due to El Nino effect, global warming or some environmental upset. Apparently this year's winter is gonna be the coldest in the last 40 years as well... Brrr.... Good thing i just bought myself a winter coat today, will come in handy.
Yup, so that's all for news from Nottingham.. Not entirely good news.

Went for my first bible study today, was 2 hours long! Was on how to be a witness for Christ in words, deeds, attitudes and relationships.. I've been really frustrated with myself lately. Realise how many opportunities i have here to share the gospel to friends here.. But my timid and introvert nature doesnt really help. And a lot of times i'm just pure selfish and dont feel like talking to anyone at all really. Real struggle. I realised that I cannot be someone else im not, and guess God isnt asking me to try either. But action speaks louder than words most of the time... So have to let my feet do the talking... still a struggle for me though. But God and the good news has to be preached! So just gotta continue to strive on...

New look!

Decided my blog needed some sort of revamp. Must be boring looking at the same layout all the time. And black made it all too depressing, doesnt help my entries are not entirely optimistic and cheery either. Now it does look more positive, somewhat. heh. Hope you guys like the new look!

MSN's down the whole day today =/ Realised how insecure and lonely I feel without the knowledge that I can talk to people with just a click of the mouse. Oh well. Spent the evening doing some emailing instead, and reading up for my essay on "Visual Illusions". Quite an interesting topic, but when you have to write a 2000 word essay on it, now, that's a different story altogether. Gotta start from scratch cos i know nuts abt the topic. My attention span and concentration lasted for abt an hour and a half (which is considered very good!) after which i decided to check out my ex-classmate's blogs... It's been such a long time since i talked to them, have lost contact with most of them really. Most of the guys are in army now, the girls, most in NUS doing Med, others in US... Reading their blogs brought back fond memories of JC... though I didnt really bond well with my classmates but there were good times in class, when we'll entertain ourselves in class with stupid and utterly pointless topics and all. heh.
Our lives all seem so different, it's virtually impossible to keep in touch, really. To do that would just be too tiring, so guess a blog somehow connects us all together. And when we do meet again, we wouldn't be too much of a stranger to one another :)

Thanks for reading my blog you guys. Even with all my complainings, groanings and mussings... i'll try have more 'happy' entries yeah? Hope this counts as one. Heh.

Miss you all so much. Oh, if you guys have a blog, do let me know your blog add yeah? So i'll have more life stories to read... thanks.

Psalm 77

Psalm 77
For the director of music. For Jeduthun. Of Asaph. A psalm.

1 I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me.
2 When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands and my soul refused to be comforted.
3 I remembered you, O God, and I groaned; I mused, and my spirit grew faint.
Selah
4 You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak.
5 I thought about the former days, the years of long ago;
6 I remembered my songs in the night. My heart mused and my spirit inquired:
7 "Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again?
8 Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time?
9 Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in anger withheld his compassion?"
Selah
10 Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: the years of the right hand of the Most High."
11 I will remember the deeds of the LORD ; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago.
12 I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds.
13 Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great as our God?
14 You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.
15 With your mighty arm you redeemed your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph. Selah
16 The waters saw you, O God, the waters saw you and writhed; the very depths were convulsed.
17 The clouds poured down water, the skies resounded with thunder; your arrows flashed back and forth.
18 Your thunder was heard in the whirlwind, your lightning lit up the world; the earth trembled and quaked.
19 Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty waters, though your footprints were not seen
20 You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.

Lovely psalm. kinda explains how i'm feeling now. Sunday service was good today, worship was almost like home, some hyms some slow song some fast songs. Sermon by Peter Lewis was good. Went to a friend's house for lunch after that, she cooked chinese dishes for us. really nice of her. Wanted to go down to Beeston (small town near the university campus) to buy some stuff but by the time i went there it was closed (i forgot the shops close at 4pm on sundays! Some shops dont even open on sundays) =/ Came back feeling kinda tired, and mentally drained, head was spinning, another one of my moody spells. (No logical reason for them, really) Not a really good end to the week, but hope the week ahead will be better.

Have a good week in school and at work you guys. God bless and keep you all.

The great exchange

Let us come before His throne of grace and love
and exchange -
our weariness for His strength
our weakness for His power
our darkness for His light
our problems for His solutions
our frustrations for His peace
our turmoil for His calm
our hopes for His promises
our afflictions for His balm of comfort
our questions for His answers
our confusion for His knowledge
our doubt for His assurance
our nothingness for His awesomeness
the temporal for the eternal
and the impossible for the possible.
Amen.

-adapted from "A woman after God's own heart" by Elizabeth George

"But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." Luke 10:42

Been quite busy the past few days. Sleeping late lately (pun intended, heh) Sometimes get so caught up in things to do, that I just fall asleep on my bed while praying. Had my first tutorial today, 5 in a group, i was so nervous my hands kept on sweating and shaking. We had some discussion abt what psychology is and I tried to come up with some intelligent answer to which he didnt comment much on. My hp started vibrating in the middle of class so got quite embarrassed as well. heh. So when it was finally over after an hour of intense nervousness and uneasiness, i heaved a sigh of relief. Heh. So much for my first tutorial class. And. Ive got to do a presentation next week. =/ Bleh. I've decided to take modern theology instead of moral philosophy as my elective module. Modern theology seems so qhim, harder than i thought. It's been 4 lectures and im still clueless abt what im supposed to know. sigh. God help me. Well, at least it might help me to better understand some bible doctrines better.
Another week's over! :) The days are passing faster than I thought. Thats good :) Soon it'll be christmas! whee. And i can see my mom again. Though i cant see you guys =/ But im sure you'll have a great Christmas wherever you are! Will miss spending christmas with you all.

Ok, thats abt all for today. Have a great weekend ahead my friends!

Goose fair and other unimpt stuff...

I don't normally update my blog in the midst of the week, but this will be an exception.. Some interesting things happened today, some which brought a smile to a friend's face when i told her abt it. So maybe, just maybe, and i hope, it might bring a grin to yours too :) It never hurts to smile once in a while, even if it's over stupid things.
Well, the day started out pretty normally, stayed in my room, went online, looking for some info on the net, read the Bible, read a storybook, revised some german words (which i think i have forgotten by now =/) and did my own stuff mainly. Yup. So some insight into what i do when i'm in my room.
The 'interesting' things happened later in the afternoon when I went down to play tennis with some Singaporeans/Malaysians. Turned out i was the only Year1 there, felt kinda out-of-place but I just played with them anyway, needed to exercise and also let out some stuff on the ball (now you know why i hit so hard, heh) We were just minding our own business when suddenly a sea of bare-skinned people came running unto the field just beside the courts. To our horror/amusement/delight, they were the rugby boys training stark naked! (the temp was abt 10 degrees celsius!) Thankfully for me, they were quite far away so i couldnt see much. Some people were so excited they were shouting for someone to get a camera quick to take a shot at them.
Soon after it started to rain, we thought it was just a passing shower, but it just came on and off, till the heavens finally seemed to decide it'll just let all the water out at once and it poured! It was then I came to my senses and decided to stop playing and get shelter (by that time i was drenched already...) And worse thing was, the road i had to walk to get back to my hall was blocked by the rugby guys! argh. I tried to find another route back but couldnt so I just took shelter somewhere till they finally decided to disperse (they probally couldnt take the cold with nothing on, heh) So i walked back cold, and wet. Thank God i didn't catch a cold.
In the evening, I went down to a fun fair in town with some of my friends. The goose fair, which they call it, is an annual event held in Nottingham, and is one of the largest fun-fairs in UK. And HUGE it was. It's like 5 times the size of Escape themepark! (if any of you have been there before...) Well, except that they had scarier rides there. Didnt intend to take ant rides intially but got persuaded by one of my friends. hmm. It's once a year, why not? heh. So spent 3pounds (!) on ONE ride that lasted about 15mins (although after 5 mins i hoped it would just stop) it's one of those spinning rides that just tosses you up, down, sideways and you close your eyes and hope it'll be over soon. heh. But i enjoyed the adrenaline rush for that moment, i havent sat one of those rides for a long time... Even if i wanted to, Sgp doesnt have them.
Weather was freezing cold tonight, i was so cold my knees were knocking and i had to keep on jumping up and down just so that i could feel my toes. Apparently temp dropped to 5 dgrees celsius tonight! I must started getting out all my winter clothing already. OR just start eating more. Heh. Leaves are falling and all, summer's gone and autumn's here. Soon it'll be winter...
ok. I shall stop here. It's been one loooong entry. Gotta wake up for class tmr as well!
God bless you guys and keep you always, wherever you are - Singapore, Shanghai, US and Australia! :)

Titleless

Can't seem to explain this feeling that's inside of me
Things seem to be working out fine,
the day's go by like the seasons.
But there's always something i know
that's not right inside of me
I don't want it to be there
But it's like a cancer
spreading through
I try to ignore it
Pretend it's not there
but it haunts me
everyday...

Standing in a midst of friends
But feel so out of place
like a zebra amongst horses
Just wanna run away
somewhere where no one can see me
Cos nobody would know then
What's going on
inside of me...

Sorry guys, just needed to let out.
Feeling down all of a sudden, wouldnt call it lonely. Just empty and tired from fighting. or maybe. i'm just missing home and all it's familiarity.
Anyway, thanks for reading...

First week at school

First week at school has come and gone. It's been a pretty fast week. Though sometimes I feel like ive been here for a few months already (though it's only been a month since ive arrived), can't wait till June hols when I can come back to Singapore!
Tutorials, practicals and seminars (like class discussions) havent started this week so it's been a pretty slack week in terms of class time (only abt 2 hours a day. With my wednesday totally free! ( I already sense some envious ple out there...heh) Well, there's always a flip side to the coin, i got LOTS of readings to do on my own... i've got like 8 THICK textbooks in my room which i have yet to touch, and I have to get down to them soon...
I'm also gonna do german and an introduction course to modern theology in my first term as my electives. German is rather fun, for now. I can count from 1 to 10! Whee. It's quite fun learning a new language initially but it's not easy, esp the pronunciation bit, it's rather strange... I'm the ONLY chinese among abt 100 ple doing modern theology, quite intimidating and challenging, but I really wanna learn more abt Christian theology... Wanted to do moral philosophy but when i went for the first lecture i didnt feel too comforatble with some philosophical views - like actions are morally right cos God commands it, or did God command it cos it is morally right? Really qhim stuff. Interesting but not for me.

Have been feeling very mentally tired lately, so many things ard me demanding my attention i just dont know what to think abt sometimes. Gets me kinda frustrated and down. God has sustained me each day, and I'll cling on to Him for His grace.

Thank God I dont have many classes cos I enjoy the free time I have, i feel more at ease when I'm alone in my room. But there are times when I choose to go out to socialise, I wont coop myself up in the room although sometimes im attempted to do just that. heh.

Well, hope you guys are doing alright wherever you are, and whatever you're in the midst of now. Hope to catch up with you all soon! Take care and may our Father bless you and keep you!