sunday song

Weekend's over... Another week of work ahead. For those dreading the week cos of challenges, uncertainty, fear at school or work, i pray the words of this song encourages you. Have a blessed week!
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Voice of Truth - Casting Crowns

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of faith it takes
To climb out of this boat I'm in
Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone
Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus is
And He's holding out His hand

Pre-chorus:
But the waves are calling out my name
And they laugh at me
Reminding me of all the times I've tried before and failed
The waves they keep on telling me
Time and time again.
"Boy, you'll never win!""You'll never win!"

Chorus:
But the voice of truth tells me a different story
The voice of truth says, "Do not be afraid!"
The voice of truth says, "This is for My glory"
Out of all the voices calling out to me
I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

Oh what I would do to have
The kind of strength it takes to stand before a giant
With just a sling and a stone
Surrounded by the sound of a thousand warriors
Shaking in their armor
Wishing they'd have had the strength to stand

Bridge:
But the stone was just the right size
To put the giant on the ground
And the waves they don't seem so high
From on top of them lookin' down
I will soar with the wings of eagles
When I stop and listen to the sound of Jesus
Singing over me

I will choose to listen and believe the voice of truth

end of week 2 at Psych branch

it's been some time since i last blogged, it's been a busy and tiring week that i couldn't find the time... Hmm. Quite tough to summarize the week in one entry. Spent quite a lot of time with the psychologists, observing how they conducted group therapy and counselling sessions with the inmates, as well as sat in for one one-to-one interview with one of them. It's been quite an experience, overwhelming at times, not knowing what to expect or how to respond to certain situations, how to act, what to say, what is appropriate and what is not... My perception on the inmates there have gone from fear, to complacency, and now i'm still trying to figure out. A complicated and unpredictable bunch of people. My supervisor left a deep impression on me, a Christian Indian man who loves the Lord and has a heart for the prisoners there. Can see something so different in him, that compassion and wisdom when he speaks to them. Can see the prisoners respect him. It's been encouraging sitting in his sessions. Though it's not a guarantee that they will not come back to prison again, i can see their lives have been impacted by this one guy whom God is using. He shared with me how God is moving in the prison... wish i could share it with someone sometimes, yet it seems that prison is such a taboo topic. Even I am not sure how much to tell cos i'm supposed to keep some things confidential.
Next week on to programmes branch!! don't know what to expect or what's planned for me. I'll just go in and see what God has in store...

"I, the LORD, have called you in righteousness;
I will take hold of your hand.
I will keep you and will make you
to be a covenant for the people
and a light for the Gentiles,
to open eyes that are blind,
to free captives from prison
and to release from the dungeon those who sit in darkness. " Isaiah 42:6-7

Father, teach me
humility
grant me
discernment and wisdom
give me
your heart and compassion
for them
hating the SIN
but loving the SINNER.

I learnt this from a thought-provoking movie i watched this week called "Dead Man Walking":
Killing, stealing, violence and rape are all terrible sins
But so are lying, coveting, lust, jealousy, envy, hate, unforgiveness, etc....
We ALL have sinned and fallen short of His glory
only His grace and forgiveness can cleanse us and make us righteous before Him
Who am i to condemn or judge?
but to convey the TRUTH with GRACE

Day 1 @ Psych branch

First day at a new department. Was briefed in the morning about what the department does. hmm. which i kinda forgot cos of info overload. but from what i remember they do risk and clinical assessments for the offenders (thats what they call them) for pre-sentencing (i.e. before the judge sentences them) and for pre-release (i.e. before they are released) duh. heh. They also do special assessments for sex offenders and violent people... they run rehabitilation programmes for the inmates in the hope of changing them for the better and stop them from re-offending when they are released back to society.
Had the privilege of going down to Cluster A (i.e. changi prison itself) with some psychologists. Didn't do much though. One of them spent the entire afternoon briefing us on their job scope and the various psychological tests they do on the inmates there. Had a talk on 'safety and security issues for psychologists and counsellors' after that. Discussed about what we should do in case an inmates tries to take us hostage. heh. But the officer stressed it was a HYPOTHETICAL situation. heh. well, i'll soon find out.
But from what the psychologists tell me, i don't think the inmates are that bad. In fact, heard one of the inmates was a president scholar and another, a priest. All kinds of people in there. But they still deserve to be given a second chance in life. Father, please help me see them through Your eyes. For they matter to You too.

simple but beautiful song - enjoy

Hungry i come to You
for i know You satisfy
I am empty
but i know Your love does not run dry

So i wait on You
So i wait on You

I'm falling on knees
offering all of me
Jesus Youre all this heart is living for

Broken i run to You
for Your arms are open wide
I am weary
but i know Your touch restores my life


oh, FH i learnt how to play this song from the 'i come before You' chords! my bro figured it out. cool eh? heh.
oh if youre free and bored can check out this website http://www.rbc.org/utmost/
has quite a lot of cool articles in there....

Day 4 @ R & P

Nothing very much exciting today. Went for a Directorate meeting in the morning. it's like a weekly meeting where the director of prison and all the heads of the various departments come together to discuss issues. I just sat in and listened to their discussion lar. Thankful for the privilege to sit in for all these though i'm some smnall fry, but next time they'll be my bosses so i better get used to it first! heh. Spent the rest of the afternoon ploughing through more literature on prison practices... Man, feels like school again. All that reading and research and typing.
Last day at R & P tmr. gonna miss the people.

Day 3 @ R & P

Today started off quite quiet. Many people were out for course in the morning so left me alone in the office =/ But started on the research project i'm supposed to work on. tough work ploughing through those stacks of literature man. phew.
Attended another meeting this afternoon, this time with the head of prisons, Mr Chua Chin Kiat (hope i got his name right. heh) My department was presenting a proposal to him, so quite stress. But i was just an observer la. He's quite a friendly guy, laughs quite a lot for a big boss. Different from what i had expected. In fact a lot of misconceptions about prisons and prison officers have been changed the past 3 days. Most of the prison officers are all really down-to-earth and nice (for no better word) people. I like the working culture here, though it's ever so busy and stressful with the constant need and push for changes and improvement in the prison system. Quite exciting to see how it has developed over the years, but i think it's heading in the right direction though not at all times it might be straight. A lot of knots in the system to unentangle still. But there is hope yet.
All in a day's work.

Day 2 @ R & P

Today was more exciting than yesterday. Was brought round the offices of the VIPs at HQ... only got to meet the head of my department though. Spoke to him for a while. Was asked to sit in for a department meeting with him after that. Lasted 3 hours!!! phew. my butt was aching like mad by the end of it all. heh. Lunch after that at changi airport with my colleagues.
Came back to have another long chat with the second in charge of the department, Dr. Neo, she has a PhD in Psychology and heard she's one smart and intimidating woman! She was telling me some of the politics of the prison service and other stuff... quite enlightening and thought-provoking.
Oh will finally have some work to do from tmr onwards. She assigned me to help her with a research project (confidential so cant post here!) and write a report by the end of it. Hmm. i'm starting to regret asking her to give me work now. heh. oh wells. At least i don't feel so useless now. Only complain i have is how early i have to get up in the morning now! Not used to it after so many late mornings in UK... heh. A taste of working life, i now have.
ok a short summary of my day, ta!

Day 1 @ Research and Planning Branch at Sgp Changi Prison

Just came back from work. It's been quite an easy day for me... settling admin stuff, getting to know the people in my department, being briefed...
Was a pleasant surprise when i found out my supervisor was some guy i met a few times and got to know a bit before i left for UK... He was a scholar too and i remember him giving me lots of useful advice. Found out he's a christian today, a committed and G0d-fearing one, and he shared with me about how God had called him to the prison service and some of his experiences there over the years. It was both challenging (scary) and encouraging at the same time. But reminds me of why i signed on to the prison service, and to keep my eyes focused on God and not on the difficulties and politics involved.
People in the department are all very easy-going and friendly... Didn't do much today except edit a report and read some annual reports. slack. heh. thank God! But prob have more to do soon... stay tuned!

reflections

Was reading through some of my friends blogs... catching up on their lives, so many things happens in such a short span of time i feel so left-behind and cut-off sometimes. But it was nice jus reading through the things they say, the least i could do to catch up with them... so when i do meet them again it wouldn't seem so long and so awkward.
Went for a run at the beach this morning. Haven't done that in quite a while. Stamina's very bad now. heh. But breeze was nice and caught some people wond-surfing. Sat on the breakwater for a while and listened to the waves and wind as i closed my eyes...
Realise how glommy and inward-looking i've been the past 2 weeks or so, lost all of joy and sense of focus and purpose. Was asking God why He brought me back here and what He wants me to do now...
Sudden change of plans. I will be starting work this monday! gasp! Mix of excitement and apprehension. Don't really know what to expect, but i pray for His confidence, wisdom and guidance. I'm sure it will be a great experience. Gives me sth to do as well.
Will speak to FH today finally =) Need to make some other calls as well, can't isolate myself forever. Need to pick myself up and regain focus again. And now, to try cook lunch for mom and myself. heh.

back in action!

Hi all,

it's been exactly a month since i've come back from UK. Didn't manage to update cos didn't have internet at home, but managed to persuade my mom to get dial-up at least. heh. better than nothing. Don't know how many of you will read this, must have thought i stopped blogging for gd...
A month seems so fast. Don't know where all that time flies. Just got back from a 2 weeks trip from Australia to visit my aunt with my mom. Feels strange and surreal to be back home once more. With FH gone, another stage another phase...

Time's in Sgp been good, though i haven't caught up with many people yet... sorry i haven't contacted you guys. Contact me lar, 92381910. heh. Will be going back to England on 23rd Sept, tentatively. No plans except for a months work in Changi Prison in August. Yup. Nothing much exciting in my life right now, heh.

Well, till another time, God bless,
Pam