Next stop: Singapore :)

Got back my final result for my first year today. Praise God for His grace and providence! Got a 2-1 :) Last time i would have grumbled cos i would want a 1st (the best grade) but i'm learning to be content for whatever i get now... Learning to surrender and let go.
It's my last day in my room at Cavendish (that's the name of my hall where i've been living for the past 9 months) Gonna miss my own room, but more than that, the friends i've made here and all the wonderful memories. Some i will still be seeing again but others i can only thank God for placing them for this short period in my life... It's become almost like a second home to me now.
But as i pack i'm looking forward to my homecoming to my first home, to the familiarity where i've grown up and to see loved ones again. For a break from studying, to be refreshed, catch up with friends and family, as well as to prepare myself for the next year of uni ahead of me which will be so much more challenging and demanding... But i shall not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own (Matthew 6:34)
I shall just appreciate and thank God for the short time i have back and to spend time with people, especially those i've been missing ;)
As i board the coach then the airplane tomorrow, i will look back and thank God for His amazing grace that has brought me through my first year here, and in all that He's done and taught me. I'm eager to share with you guys back home :)
A friend asked me a question today: Do you think you have changed since you came here?
I didn't really know how to answer her. I guess, yes, to a certain extent i have. I think i've become more independent (than i thought i was), and perhaps i've a different persepctive on certain issues and things now. But other than that, i think i'm still pretty much the same old me. Well, you guys can decide when i'm back home and tell me. And no, i've not acquired a british accent... heh.

To my friends elsewhere, i will miss you all, have a great summer wherever you are and see you all back in Notts soon! God bless you all.

And now, to pack. And home. in 39 hours from now =)

on home

It's my turn to go home at last
After seeing many others leave...
Seems like a dream,
Feels so unreal sometimes.
It's like sth you've been yearning for so long
that when it finally happens it's hard to believe it's true.

In all honesty
I really don't know how to feel towards it,
confused, excited, happy, nervous, fear, uncertainty?
But i know for sure
that when i see the faces i've not seen for so long
All these fears and uncertainties will fade in the distance...
and i will be happy and smile once again =)

Father's love letter - the cry of a Father's heart from Genesis to Revelation

i know this may seem very long but try reading it slowly and aloud (at least loud enough for you to hear if you don't want to disturb your neighbours) i'm saying this cos i just skimmed thru it last time but when a friend read it out one day the words held more meaning and impact. And now, once in a while, when i'm feeling down, i will come back to it and i will be comforted, strengthened and encouraged. Know it not only in your mind but in your heart as well. =)

My Child…
You may not know me, but I know everything about you…Psalm 139:1I know when you sit down and when you rise up …Psalm 139:2I am familiar with all your ways …Psalm 139:3Even the very hairs on your head are numbered…Matthew 10:29-31For you were made in my image …Genesis 1:27In me you live and move and have your being …Acts 17:28 For you are my offspring …Acts 17:28 I knew you even before you were conceived …Jeremiah 1:4-5 I chose you when I planned creation …Ephesians 1:11-12 You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book…Psalm 139:15-16I determined the exact time of your birth and where you would live …Acts 17:26 You are fearfully and wonderfully made …Psalm 139:14 I knit you together in your mother's womb …Psalm 139:13 And brought you forth on the day you were born …Psalm 71:6I have been misrepresented by those who don't know me …John 8:41-44I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of love…1 John 4:16 And it is my desire to lavish my love on you …1 John 3:1 Simply because you are my child and I am your Father …1 John 3:1I offer you more than your earthly father ever could …Matthew 7:11 For I am the perfect father …Matthew 5:48 Every good gift that you receive comes from my hand…James 1:17For I am your provider and I meet all your needs …Matthew 6:31-33 My plan for your future has always been filled with hope …Jeremiah 29:11 Because I love you with an everlasting love …Jeremiah 31:3 My thoughts toward you are countless as the sand on the seashore ...Psalms 139:17-18And I rejoice over you with singing …Zephaniah 3:17 I will never stop doing good to you …Jeremiah 32:40 For you are my treasured possession …Exodus 19:5 I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul …Jeremiah 32:41 And I want to show you great and marvelous things …Jeremiah 33:3 If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me …Deuteronomy 4:29 Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart …Psalm 37:4 For it is I who gave you those desires …Philippians 2:13 I am able to do more for you than you could possibly imagine …Ephesians 3:20 For I am your greatest encourager …2 Thessalonians 2:16-17I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles …2 Corinthians 1:3-4 When you are brokenhearted, I am close to you …Psalm 34:18 As a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart …Isaiah 40:11 One day I will wipe away every tear from your eyes …Revelation 21:3-4 And I'll take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth …Revelation 21:3-4 I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son, Jesus …John 17:23 For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed …John 17:26He is the exact representation of my being …Hebrews 1:3 He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you…Romans 8:31 And to tell you that I am not counting your sins …2 Corinthians 5:18-19Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled …2 Corinthians 5:18-19 His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you…1 John 4:10I gave up everything I loved that I might gain your love …Romans 8:31-32 If you receive the gift of my son Jesus, you receive me …1 John 2:23And nothing will ever separate you from my love again …Romans 8:38-39Come home and I'll throw the biggest party heaven has ever seen …Luke 15:7 I have always been Father, and will always be Father …Ephesians 3:14-15 My question is…Will you be my child? …John 1:12-13 I am waiting for you …Luke 15:11-32
Love, Your Dad. Almighty God

i'm coming home...

Alas! A week more before i'm leaving on a jet plane - this time, the other way round. Seems so unreal sometimes, after 9 months here, it's passed so fast, yet i've grown so used to the way of life here, that it feels weird leaving. Now when i think of where to buy stuff when i go home, i can't seem to remember where to go =/ but guess when i'm back in familiar territory it'll all come back to me...
This week ended off with a potluck at a pastor's house, i've been eating so much this week. Rarely eat hallfood nowadays, so fed well. heh.
Spent the evening packing. Strange feeling. This is my 3rd time packing my room (once in dec and once in march when i had to move out of my hall during the hols) but now, it's different, i'm packing to go home. Have to decide what to leave behind and what to bring home with me... Each time i pack, i dig up all the old stuff, the notes people wrote for me before i came here and makes me less afraid to go home :) I also realise how i've not used many stuff that i brought here last sept (for one, i haven't worn any of the skirts i brought here. heh.) and i think i might have outgrown some of my clothes as well. bleh. Don't know how i'm gonna carry so much stuff back, plus i promised to help a few friends bring back some stuff for them as well... hmm.
I'm planning to play some tennis this week, to burn off all the fats i've accumulated during the exams and all. heh. Plus brush up my tennis skills before i come back (i hear some of you have improved!) Say my final farewells before i leave, buy sovenirs, etc.
I shall also do some reflection about the past year here, how God has been so good and faithful. How i started off on such a shaky note, but He has provided a fruitful and good year for me. Many things to share when i come back :)

Guess some of you might be away at abc this week. first time in sometime i'm not going but i trust it will be a good and refreshing time!

the Never-Forsaking God

He Himself has said, ’I will never leave you nor forsake you’ —Hebrews 13:5

What line of thinking do my thoughts take? Do I turn to what God says or to my own fears? Am I simply repeating what God says, or am I learning to truly hear Him and then to respond after I have heard what He says? "For He Himself has said, ’I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we may boldly say: ’The Lord is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?’ " ( Hebrews 13:5-6 ).
"I will never leave you . . ."— not for any reason; not my sin, selfishness, stubbornness, nor waywardness. Have I really let God say to me that He will never leave me? If I have not truly heard this assurance of God, then let me listen again.
"I will never . . . forsake you." Sometimes it is not the difficulty of life but the drudgery of it that makes me think God will forsake me. When there is no major difficulty to overcome, no vision from God, nothing wonderful or beautiful— just the everyday activities of life— do I hear God’s assurance even in these?
We have the idea that God is going to do some exceptional thing— that He is preparing and equipping us for some extraordinary work in the future. But as we grow in His grace we find that God is glorifying Himself here and now, at this very moment. If we have God’s assurance behind us, the most amazing strength becomes ours, and we learn to sing, glorifying Him even in the ordinary days and ways of life.

- taken from "My Utmost for His Highest Daily Devotional" (thank you meixin for leading me to this edifying and encouraging website =))

on today's bbq...

Haven't had a bbq in a long time! Since Sept i think, when i first came here and the weather was still not too cold. Now that summer is almost here, everywhere i go i see people having BBQs.
Today we had one for the "solid rock" leavers (those graduating this year) For those who don't know, Solid Rock is a christian group comprising mainly of singaporeans and malaysians, and are a funky group of people :) And yes, followers of Jesus Christ.
Thank God for good weather today, it's been gloomy and rainy the past few days, so praise God it didn't rain today and it wasn't too hot either! I dont know how i'm gonna get used to the hot and humid weather back in sgp. heh.
As usual, there was TONS of GOOD FOOD. heh. But didn't get to try all the food cos i was busy bbqing and running here and there. But there was more than enough food lar. My fav was satay!!! Basically everything was good lar. I smell like bbq myself now. heh.
Now that the bbq is over, feel kinda lost as too what to do. A 'what now?' kind-of-feeling. But guess i will have to get ready to go back home soon, have to decide how i'm gonna spend my last week here... Mixed feelings right now, happy i'm going back, yet sad i'll be leaving my friends here. But i figure i will look forward to home more as the day approaches. See some of you in Sgp soon :)
Some pics of today's bbq:
http://community.webshots.com/album/361129545STqvAS?847

on my week

it's been such a busy week for me, even more so than during my exams. Haven't had much time to sit back, rest or reflect. Guess it's gd also in a way, that stuff to do prevents me from thinking too much.
Been meeting up with various people, for various reasons. heh. too long a story to explain here, ask me when i come back if u want to know. But it's been a gd week, though at times i'm just so mentally tired. One of the things i'm helping to do is to organize and prepare for a bbq tmr. After tmr, things should slow down a bit. And i can start thinking about packing and going home. Probably meet up with some friends to say my farewells before i'm homeward bound :)

Have a blessed weekend!

God is good!

Hi all,

it's been a great weekend for me and those who were at the christian retreat. God really moved in every one of us and touched our hearts beyond human understanding and explanation. Many tears were shed, and hearts cried out to God but i believe deeper than the emotional experience, there was a greater and deeper work done in us, in our spirits, like a seed planted, to grow if we allow it to. There was solid teaching (by a singaporean now working in Leeds but preaches part-time as well) and had 2 talks each in the morning, afternoon and evening. We didn't get much sleep as well in the 2 nights there, but God's grace and strength sustained us and refreshed us spiritually and mentally at the right times when we were really tired...

I went there not knowing what to expect but that God would not disappoint us, but He gave me more than i could expect for.
It brought me back to the basics of why I am a christian, why i believe and follow Jesus, why i do the things i do as a christian. It brought me back to the cross. Something which i often take for granted. I had a fresh revelation of our Father's love and forgiveness for us, as well as what He accomplished on the cross for us through Jesus' death, the freedom from past hurts, sins and bondages that hold us! Hallelujah! I experienced a deeper thankfulness and gratefulness and i pray that i would never ever take His love and death for granted again. The pain He had to bear, none can comprehend. His love for us, none can fully comprehend as well.

The Lamb who sits upon the throne
who was sacrificed and died in place for us
to wash away our sins
The Lion of Judah
Strong, Holy and Majestic
Our loving Father
who loves us unconditionally
and embraces us when we come back to Him in repentance

Theme verse at camp from Hebrews 12:1-2

1Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. 2Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.