The Weekend and The Week Ahead...

Cornwall trip was great =) From trying to squash tents, sleeping bags, food, portable stoves, luggages into a small car, to the long car ride there with the conversations, and the guys cracking all sorts of jokes to make it less boring =P We lost our way and couldn’t find the right camping ground but eventually we found another one. God defied the weather forecast and gave us great weather on the 1st 2 nights so we could cook… Brought some noodles, pasta, can food… Turned out it wasn’t enough for the hungry guys. Heh. But we had lots of snacks and all lar…
The beach there is really beautiful as what people say… We played frisbee and ran in the sand under the moonlight, enjoying the sound of the waves, watching the seagulls, and feeling the cool sea breeze blowing against our faces. 2nd day drove to another beach, spent some time there, some of us swam… the water was freezzzing so I chose to stay relatively dry and just go knee deep. Almost got thrown into the sea though! Bah.
In the evening there wasn’t really much to do other than go to the bar… sadly they don’t have drinks like milo, or the tarik… mostly alcoholic drinks =/ But in the end we just da-baoed some pizza to bring back to the tent to eat lar. Had a good time of sharing and fellowship, it rained heavily at night, but thank God for the tents which kept us warm and dry =)
3rd day the weather was really bad… was raining cats and dogs and the wind was so strong I felt like I was being blown away! Hid in the phone booth at one point of time cos got a bit scared. Heh. It was amazing to see the huge waves… so majestic it made me feel so small, and reminded me of how great God is… that He controls the waves. Saw some brave surfers doing wakeboarding! Anyhow, we didn’t let the bad weather dampen our spirits, we braved the rain and wind and walked around town and by the beach even. Heh.
Posted some pics here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/17466796@N00/

Next thing up for me is…. Tennis! Going to watch the Wimbeldon Open next week. I’m not a die-hard tennis fan that follows all the seasons or have any particular ‘idols’ I support, but I did use to watch the games with my dad occasionally. Thought since it’s my last chance to catch it LIVE, why not? Should be exciting =) Also, going to Edinburgh next week for a psychology conference. Many professors and researchers will be presenting their latest research findings there, I’m not exactly the sort of person who’s interested in research, but I thought it’ll be eye-opening to see how’s it like. A friend I know will be presenting sth with her professor too =) Yup, then a few days later my mom and sis will be coming up to Notts… Then graduation on 12th July. Wow it’s fast. Scary to think about it sometimes… The feeling of leaving and moving on gets stronger when friends start to leave and I’m alone… I’ll only start my training at Prison School in Jan 2008, so that leaves me sometime… I’ve got some ideas/ plans in mind, but as it is said, “Man can plan his steps, but God determines his paths”. So right now I’m just praying and taking small steps at a time. Pray that He’ll guide me as I learn to listen to His voice and submit to His leading.

Another Weekend Away :)

Will be away for another weekend. Going to a place in England called Cornwall, it's supposed to have the most beautiful beaches there!!! Been wanting to visit since i've heard of it but never got the chance to. The planning of the trip was quite eventful... Some of us went through quite a lot of time and trouble to plan and co-ordinate this trip, wasn't easy to fit everyone's schedule in. It's quite far from Notts and need to rent 2 cars to bring everyone there, but we didn't have enough drivers. But we finally managed to persuade a friend to go. So yeah, after a lot of changing plans, thinking we'll go and then thinking we'll not go, we're finally going :) Thank God lar, i really wanted to go, but submitted it to Him whether we could go or not. Weather forecast is not really good though, heavy showers on Sunday, and reports of flooding near where we are camping... But we're mentally prepared. Heh. It will be interesting. Pray for safety. Reminds me of camping in America last December...

Retreat last weekend was great. Was good to take a step back and reflect on all that's happened the past month - exams, plagarism saga, results... As well as take time to think about how to spend the next few months. I've received word from Prisons that my training only starts in Jan 2008, so that means i've got quite a lot of time on my hands. I've got quite a lot of different ideas/options i'm thinking about... But too many choices makes me quite confused and a bit troubled as to what i want and what i should do. If you're praying for me, pls pray that i will hear from God where He wants me to be and what He wants me to do. Pray i'll put Him first, learn to take delight in Him, and not run around just doing things without involving Him... Thanks :)

Sharing...

Results are out. I’ve got a 2-1 (2nd upper class honours). It was what I was expecting and is a rather reasonable grade. Don’t know why but I wasn’t happy as people and myself thought I should be. Perhaps cos many friends around me got a 1st, and me being the comparing and competitive person I am, felt inferior and disappointed… Mom reminded me of 1 Thess 5:18 “No matter what happens, always be thankful, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus”. A friend also reminded me that God doesn’t look at my marks, but at my heart, which I must say isn’t so nice either… but yeah, God is humbling me, and I’m learning to be content and thankful for what He has given me. It is only by His grace that I got this 2-1. I’ve got 2 options – to dwell in self-pity, or to let God be God and to pick myself up. My soul shall choose to bless and praise Him…

I’ve joined facebook recently, and I’ve realized I’m not into it as most people are, which makes me feel rather left out at times. Which shows that I still crave for people’s acceptance to a large extent, instead of finding fulfilment in God alone... How does one do that? Is it really possible?

Anyway today I helped out with some volunteering work with elderly people. Watched a concert and had lunch with them. Most of them couldn’t walk properly and were living alone. Talked to 2 Jamaican ladies who are in their 80s… Here in Britain these elderly people are neglected and ‘abandoned’ by their children, and feel especially lonely after their other halfs pass away… I wonder how that compares to Singapore. It’s hard for me to completely understand the hardship many of them have been through and are going through now, but it is a good reminder for us to take care of our parents and not to neglect them when they get older… Going away this weekend for a retreat. Quite looking forward to it. Think it will be good time of learning and fellowship =)

Take care and may you find Him near in all that you do this week ahead!

Happenings...

Past few days have been spending quite a lot of time with friends having picnics/ BBQs/ dinners… you could say pretty much enjoying life. But sometimes I do think that too much food and fun can take God’s place and is not good for the soul. Till I start to get obsessed with self-denial like fasting and I just wanna retreat from everything. But I guess there’s a time for everything, I have to learn to strike a balance between both, not to go to either extreme. It’s a fine line, and difficult. I pray God will teach me how to enjoy the good things in life, but not to forget Him in the midst of all this.

Results coming out this Wednesday. Feeling somewhat anxious about it, but trying not to think about it. It’s not within my control, just gotta leave it to God and to trust Him. Plans till my mom and sis comes down on 9th July are still uncertain. Pray I’ll use this time wisely. It’s only 2 months more before I return home… Still hasn’t sunk in yet. But I pray I’ll treasure and learn much within these last 2 months before I start yet another new chapter in my life...

It's over... Thank you friends, Thank You God :)

Dear friends,

Alas it’s over! :) The past 5 days since last Thursday when I first received news of my alleged offence have seemed really long. Thank you all so much for all of your words of comfort, encouragement, support and prayers. I can’t express how much they mean to me and have helped me through this challenging time. God even provided various activities gatherings with friends, and a nice day trip to Stratford in the midst of all this!

The exam board decided to deduct 10marks off my original mark for that particular coursework, which is the best possible outcome that I could get. This would make little impact on my final degree class. My offence was considered as minor and wouldn’t be held in the university records. Praise God! He has heard my cry and answered our prayers.

To be honest, after looking through the report of my alleged offence, I felt that I was really ‘unlucky’ to be implicated in the first place, and that I shouldn’t receive the 10marks deduction and went through a whole lot of trouble to clarify and argue my case after that. However, they still didn’t change their decision. Nevertheless, I realize although I might not have plagiarised ‘enough’ to pass the ‘mark’, it doesn’t change the fact that I still did plagiarise to a certain extent, even if it was a little… I guess my ‘flesh’ wanted to be proven right and not be contented with the outcome. But God’s teaching me to leave the past behind, and let go of it, and to be contented with the outcome. I know that ultimately God is my judge. I’m just relieved that I’ve crossed this hurdle

God has been really faithful and good to me throughout this whole ordeal, providing and intervening in every single detail of it. I believe there’s a purpose for what has happened, to teach me some important lessons. Hopefully I’ve learnt to be more humble through this experience, and perhaps to better understand a little how it feels to be on the ‘accused’ stand, to be more careful and conscientious about my work in the future. I’ve also experienced and learnt the value of friends, and above all, to trust God above all circumstances. God is good, all the time… All the time, God is good :)

Thanks again friends… Am thankful for everything - in small or big ways that you’ve supported me in this.

In His love,
Pam

Lesson of Humility

Dear friends,
Thanks for all your support, encouragement and prayers in this difficult time. God has been very gracious to me the past few days. I managed to talk to a really kind Professor from school (the meeting was not planned, and i believe was set up by God) who has offered to give me advice and help me, and be there with me during the meeting on Thursday. I've been trying ways and means to try push the meeting earlier so I still can go for the trip to Prague and Poland. But it seems that with each push of the door, it closes on me. I know that it's not the main or important thing now, but somehow i've been stubborn, wanting my way cos of my pride. Today my last attempt failed. I struggled to let go of the trip. But I know I have to do it. I need to put first things first...

"My child, don't ignore it when the Lord disciplines you, and don't be discouraged when he corrects you. For the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punished those he accepts as his children" Hebrews 12:5-6