First Week as I/C

Dear friends,

Hello! I'm back again for the weekend. It's been quite a week...
Challenging, but enjoyable at times and learning lots.
First time managing and leading a group of NS guys from Police, SCDF, ICA & Prisons. A bunch of rugrats they are! It took me a few days to remember all their names as well as to tell them apart (seriously, they all look alike with their haircut and all. heh)
Me looking young and timid, the guys tried to 'test' me. But when they started to get too rowdy, i decided it was time to be firm and stern with them. I don't normally show my anger, but when i do, you know i mean business... I almost lost my voice shouting... but decided on the 'silent treatment' instead =P

Had back-to-back lectures on various issues on the Home Team (e.g. terrorism, internal defence, etc.), as well as National Education. Was rather interesting and insightful. We also had some team building activities and had to prepare for a 'social nite' event this coming Tuesday.
Coupled with that i had to write daily reports, so managed just slightly more than 5 hours of sleep each night this week. Really thank God for His strength and grace, couldn't have made it through without Him. Thanks for praying.

The past few weeks i've been hearing sermons on missions and God has reminded me of the passion He has placed in my heart. I believe He is calling me - It's just a matter of WHEN and WHERE...
Still have a long way to go... One step a time.

May the Lord's glory fill the earth as waters cover the sea...

Praise & Prayer Requests

I've been feeling rather out-of-touch with church of late - i've not been putting my heart and soul into the youth ministry, my passion of missions also seems to be fading... Not sure if training is consuming me, or i'm just drifitng away... It's been hard to praise and worship God of late, to be honest. The thorn in my flesh has been weighing heavily on me. A recent conversation with a friend confirmed me to have a melancholic and phlegmatic personality. I wonder: Is there room for such a personality in a christian?

Being compared to previous scholars has gotten to me of late - having to live up to the expectations of people who have walked the path that i'm on. It's smth that i struggled with in school, and it's smth God is still dealing with even right now... refining and moulding me. I've been told that to be a leader, i can't show my weaknesses to others, whatever i do, i have to try to hide it. Part of me resists that idea - perhaps cos i'm not so good at that. I think quite different from what people's impression/ stereotype of a scholar.

On a brighter note, i've achieved my GOLD for IPPT on my second try. I was rather disappointed when i only got a SILVER the first time round, cos I thought a mere C for my standing broad jump was sufficient, only to find out later that I need at least a B to get a GOLD overall. I also clocked my personal best time for my 2.4km run which was rather surprising, cos i never thought i could break the 12 minute barrier. I guess nothing is impossible if you put your mind to it, and with the Lord's help of course.

I've been appointed to be the I/C for the next 2 weeks. Will be meeting (for the first time) and leading about 30 officers from the various Home Teams (i.e. Police, ICA, CNB, SCDF, ISD) Feeling rather apprehensive about it, but i will take it on one day at a time praying for the Lord's help and wisdom.

p/s. Thank you all for your birthday messages. I honestly didn't expect them. Thanks for remembering and caring =)

On 6th July 2008

I turn 23 today and one of my closest friends is getting married on this special day =)
I'm going to have 3 celebrations this weekend - 1 with my grandma, mom, uncle, bro & sis, 1 with my dad, bro & sis, and 1 with my squadmates. I would love to spend it with some others, but time doesn't permit.

I'm quite sad that I can't be there on her wedding day... i've seen how they've gone through thick and thin to come together... their love story has amazed and touched me. Oh how i wish i had the wings of an eagle to fly over to England. i miss her so.

Been experiencing and learning new things at training. Conducted a footdrill lesson for the junior prison officers - i got feedback that my commands are much better than when i first started, but i'm too 'friendly' (as a footdrill instructor). I shouldn't smile so much and scold more. heh. Another time, we were also caught off guard to give an impromptu speech in front of the squad - which was rather nerve-wrecking for me cos public speaking is one of my greatest fears. We also had our first scenario-based training where we were given a 'mission' and had to execute it within a stipulated time. It was both exhilirating and nerve-wrecking....

I've also been facing situations where i have to make a stand and be 'different' cos of my faith. At times it's easier to go with the 'flow' and not be a sore thumb, but i know that i'm called to be the light and salt in the world. Experiencing the reality of what it means to be in the world but not of the world....

Another week ahead, new challenges to be faced, new lessons to be learnt....
His Grace Is Sufficient Each Day...